Mystery Series Theater 3000

Season 2

Message in a bottle

Comments to wyldchilde37@yahoo.com


Wyld's Notes: I wasn't sure if this series was going to make it or
not. While I loved doing the MSTings I lost my passion for the J/7
universe, and had been wholeheartedly assimilated into the T/7 realm.
Still I didn't want the series to die, and if the original Mystery
Science Theater could survive cast changes then my Mystery Series
Theater 3000 will as well. For those who read the first 12 just think
of this as another universe entirely. The crew is forced to watch the
same bad episodes, but it's a whole new crew. So with out further ado
I present Mystery Series Theater 3000 Season 2.

Disclaimer: This is done for purely entertainment purposes only, no
profit is being made or is intended to. This is not meant to infringe
upon the rights held by Paramount, Best Brains, or any others. Any
other rights are reserved. This story features B'Elanna Torres and
Seven of Nine in a loving relationship if you object to such things
you may as well move on.

Special Thanks: To Star Trek In Sound and Vision for having such a
wonderful list of quotes for me to draw on for the new theme song.

(Sung to the Love Theme to Mystery Science Theater 3000)
Sometime in the Distant Future
Round the end of season three
Voyager found itself in Borg space
Drones as far as the eye could see
Then they lucked out and met a drone
Who got the Collective to leave them alone
Then on the way back to Earth they got off track,
Encountered Pearl Forester who went on the attack.
Bridge Crew Roll Call
Janeway: "I am Captain Kathryn Janeway, of the Federation Starship
Voyager."
Chakotay: "All hands brace for impact!"
Doctor: "I'll reattach any severed limbs, just don't misplace them."
Harry: "Hi. My name's Harry read-me-like-a-book Kim."
Paris: "Captain Proton to the rescue!"
B'Elanna: "I must be completely paranoid about getting caught in a
compromising position."
Seven: "You are strong, You will make an excellent mate!"
Tuvok: "Both must resolve their Pon Farr before it kills them."
 
{Fade in on the bridge of Voyager.}
Tuvok: "Captain, sensors indicate an stationary vessel. with a human
life sign."
Janeway: "Human? On screen."
(The view screen of Voyager comes to life with the image of a dog bone
shaped ship.)
Janeway: "Hail them."
(After a moment the image of the viewscreen shows an interior of the
ship with two robots. One is golden with a long spindly body. The
second is squatter, barrel chested with a transparent head. There is a
human, male who is wearing a command red Starfleet uniform and red wig
done up in a hair bun. As they notice the hail and turn towards their
own viewscreen they freeze.)
Janeway (smirking): "I am Captain Kathryn Janeway, but I guess you
already know that."
Tom Servo (nudging the human): "MIKE!"
Mike (getting nudged by the red robot he rips the wig off his head and
hides it behind his back): "Um hi."
Crow T. Robot: "So, your that USS Voyager we have been hearing so much
about. have any Borg ladies laying around?"
Mike (swatting the golden robot): "CROW! Umm Hi Captain Janeway, small
universe. Strangely enough we are trying to get back to earth too, but
we kinda got lost."
Janeway (pointing off screen): "About 50-60,000 light years that way,
but how did you get out here? Did the Caretaker bring you?"
Tom: "There was nothing caring about Pearl Forester."
Janeway: "Who?"
(The screen suddenly spits to show the inside of a Volkswagen van, a
lager blonde woman, and a monkey in lab coat and glasses.)
Pearl: "That would be me! So Mike, I see you made some new friends."
Mike: "They were just passing by, weren't you?"
Janeway: "Now let's hold on a moment."
Peal: "I KNEW IT! You Federation types, always sticking your noses in
where you are not wanted. Well its not going to work this time. The
three musketeers are going back in the theater. and so are you."
Bobo: "Sending the holographic instructions Lawgiver."
Harry: "Captain! We are receiving a transmission with a holographic
command sequence from the monkey."
Paris: "A new holo-program?"
Bobo: "I am not a monkey! I am a mountain gorilla."
Pearl: "Can it Bobo they have to get to holodeck 2."
Janeway: "We will do no such thing."
Computer: "Warp core breach in 10 seconds."
(Janeway pauses a minute, then taps her commbadge.)
Janeway: "Janeway to command staff, meet me at holodeck 2."
Computer: "Warp core stable."
Mike: "Captain, we never meant."
Janeway: "I understand."
Pearl: "Enough! Get into the theater, and Mike? Start running!"
Tom: "We have movie sign!"
Harry: "And we have episode sign!"
{The respective crews run for the doors as the scene fades.}

{The screen fades back in on a mid 20th century theater where the
crews silhouettes can be seen sitting (left to right) Janeway,
Chakotay, Tuvok, B'Elanna, Seven, the Doctor, Harry and Paris.}
{The screen comes to life with a smock clad B'Elanna and Chakotay
walking down a hallway.}
(Paris starts laughing.)
B'Elanna: "What?"
Paris (pointing at the screen): "You've got a pocket protector."
Janeway: "Message in a Bottle" Can I hope that we'll get to see Kevin
Costner?"
{B'Elanna is talking about someone, who is cold, patronizing,
arrogant.}
Paris: "I wonder who she is talking about?"
Seven: "In comparison to B'Elanna's body temperature anyone would seem
cold."
{Chakotay says she can be difficult, and B'Elanna says she is
impossible.}
B'Elanna (as herself): "Every time I try to climb on top of her she
just rolls me over!"
{Chakotay tells B'Elanna to talk to Seven herself.}
Chakotay (as himself): "Just get a room!"
Harry: "That's not a good idea, the last time those two were in a room
together there was thumping, and shouting, I thought I would have to
call security."
(Seven and B'Elanna look at each other, and then back at the screen.)
{B'Elanna asks him if the word irrelevant means anything to him.}
Seven: "Irrelevant: to be."
(B'Elanna places a hand on Seven's forearm and Seven stops.)
{B'Elanna says she may look human, she may sound human.}
Paris: "but she breaks just like a little girl."
{Chakotay tells her that part of the problem is that B'Elanna refuses
to accept Seven as part of the crew.}
Seven (as Chakotay): "She is not just your personal playmate."
{B'Elanna tells Chakotay about Seven stealing a part from engineering,
and then locking herself in astrometrics so B'Elanna could not get
in.}
Janeway: "Well that just seems an attempt to get her attention."
B'Elanna (as herself): "She supposed to lock the doors after I get in
there with her!"
{Chakotay asks if he is supposed to throw her in the brig for the rest
of the trip home.}
B'Elanna (as herself): "That, or just tie her to my bed."
{Seven summons Chakotay to astrometrics and B'Elanna complains about
her giving orders.}
Seven (turning to B'Elanna): "I thought you liked me giving orders?"
{B'Elanna says that the next time she encounters Seven she is not
responsible for the consequences.}
B'Elanna (as herself): "I may wind up taking her, right there in front
of everyone!"
{Chakotay tells B'Elanna she is a senior officer and has to find a way
to deal with her.}
(B'Elanna sighs happily and her eyes get dreamy while Seven smirks.)
 {The scene changes to Janeway and Chakotay walking down a hallway
while they ponder why they were summoned.}
Janeway (as herself): "Seven said something about performing a
marriage ceremony?"
Chakotay (as himself): "I guess I will be the one giving B'Elanna
away."
{In astrometrics Seven tells them she managed to find something they
would want to see and it turns out to be a Federation ship.}
Seven (as herself): "It is a worthwhile Trek series."
{Chakotay says that she couldn't have extended the sensors all the way
to the alpha quadrant.}
Chakotay (as himself): "There isn't a worth while plot in this whole
quadrant."
{Seven tells them about finding an abandoned series of satellites
stretching back to the alpha quadrant.}
Paris: "Must be leftovers from the million and one cellphone
companies."
{When Seven notes the sensor is on the outer edge of the alpha
quadrant Janeway says that the ship must be on a deep space mission.}
Harry: "Those powers of observation must be taught in later courses at
the academy."
{Seven says the ship will remain in range for 41minutes.}
Seven (as herself): "After commercial breaks."
{Chakotay asks if they can use the network to send a message.}
Tuvok: "If not the episode would fall rather flat?"
Paris: "You seem rather quiet Doc?'
Doctor: "I am bracing myself for the rest of the episode."
{Seven tells Harry she is sending him the interlink frequency.}
Harry (as himself): "I'd think you'd be sending your interlink
frequency to engineering."
{On the bridge Janeway asks Seven how much time they have left.}
Seven (as herself): "Thirty-five minutes plus commercials."
{B'Elanna says that should do it.}
Harry (as himself): "That explains it."
{Janeway sends the message and then there is a pause.}
Janeway (as herself): "Come on, pickup. I know you're there."
{Tuvok says they are getting a transmission.}
Tuvok (as himself): "We are getting Starfleet's voice mail."
{They receive their own transmission and Janeway asks Seven what
happened.}
Janeway (as herself): "Either we are receiving our own transmission or
I just found my long lost twin."
{They try to find a stronger transmission, and decide on holographic,
but it would take too long to set it up. So Janeway suggests the
Doctor.}
Janeway (as herself): "It's our chance to get rid of him once and for
all."
(The Doctor takes a deep breath and braces himself.)
{In sickbay the Doctor is seen working with a green liquid.}
Doctor (as himself): "Just 3 more grams of sugar and my lime kool aid
will be complete!"
{B'Elanna rushes into sickbay and downloads the Doctor into the mobile
emitter while he's asking what she needs him for.}
Seven (pouting): "I thought she was just that insistent with me."
{She grabs the Doctor's mobile emitter and heads out of sickbay.}
Paris (as TV announcer): "It's the Popiel Pocket Doctor!"
{In astrometrics Janeway asks the Doctor to take the risk of being
transmitted across several thousand light years.}
Seven (as herself): "Do not worry Doctor, B'Elanna is quite versed in
the technology she handles."
(Seven smirks at B'Elanna and B'Elanna grins back.)
{The Doctor says he would not miss a chance to become a hero.}
Doctor (as himself): "I have a rapidly expanding ego to feed."
{B'Elanna tells the bridge that she is downloading the Doctor into the
transceiver array.}
B'Elanna (as herself): "Damn! Graybar!"
Tuvok: "Wouldn't it be more effective to upload him?"
{The Doctor vanishes from astrometrics and reappears in a white
sickbay.}
Doctor as himself): "Ok who redid the colors?"
Harry: "They must be trying to show how new the ship is."
Paris: "Just as long as they don't ask the Doc to start implanting red
jewels in people."
{The Doctor hails the bridge, and then any crewmember, with no
result.}
Paris: "They must have realized what we sent them and hid."
{The Doctor finds the bodies of one male and one female officer.}
Doctor: "Ok I am in a sickbay with two bodies and did not notice right
away. The only thing I can think of is that my program got damaged in
the transport."
{The Doctor revives a crewmember and tells him he has severe phaser
burns. The crewman tells the Doctor that Romulans are responsible.}
Tuvok: "Then it would be more logical for the wounds to have been
caused my a disruptor instead of a phaser."
{The crewman dies.}
Doctor (as himself): "You poor fool, your entire life wasted as
nothing more then a plot device."
{The scene changes to an all white bridge being manned by Romulans.}
Chakotay: "The new paint job is a bit hard on the eyes isn't it?"
{The bridge the Romulans discover a ship on their trail because they
were unable to mask their signature, and a female Romulan suggests
that they should have left some of the crew alive, but the commander
says she would be surprised by how stubborn humans can be.}
Tuvok, Seven, B'Elanna and the Doctor: "No we wouldn't."
{Back in sickbay the Doctor closes a tricorder he was using to scan
the dead crewman and asks the computer how many Romulans are on board.
To which it tells him 27.}
Doctor (as himself): "Damn! 26 I could handle!"
{The Doctor calls up specs for the ship which include tactical system
names, but when he tries to get details it tells him access is
denied.}
Chakotay: "So he can learn the names of the weapons but not what they
do?"
B'Elanna: "They must recognize him as medical staff because any
engineer worthy of the title could make educated guesses from those
names."
{The Romulan commander calls for multi-vector assault mode and the
computer announces the decoupling sequence}
Paris: "It's splitting into separate parts to fight?"
Paris and Harry: "Stephen Ratliff walks among us!"
{In the space battle a console blows up in a Romulan's face.}
B'Elanna: "I would think they would have overcome that design flaw by
now."
{The Doctor poses and the ships EMH and beings treating the Romulan,
but she asks why she should trust him. He tells her Human or Romulan
it doesn't matter.}
Doctor (as himself): "Just those two, any other species is just flat
out of luck."
{She tells him to report to her when he is finished.}
Doctor (as himself): "You can just wait outside. I'll finish him off
in a second."
{The Doctor activates the EMH-2 and it identifies him as the EMH-1 an
inferior program.}
(The Doctor glares at the rest of the crew and they clamp their mouths
shut.)
{The EMH-2 talks about the beady eyes, and terrible bedside manner.}
Janeway: "Tuvok, I want a full security sweep to find out when that
EMH was transmitted onto Voyager."
{When the EMH-2 tries to sound an intruder alert the Doctor restrains
him, after he calms him down the Doctor removes his hands and the
EMH-2 deactivates himself.}
Harry: "If only we could do that when the Doctor gets pushy."
{The Doctor commands the computer to reactivate the EMH-2}
Doctor (as himself): "Oh no you don't. You're not getting out of this
episode that easily."
{The Doctor asks if they are at war with the Romulans and the EMH-2
tells him the Romulans have not gotten involved with their war with
the Dominion.}
Paris: "We're at war with the Sci-fi channel?"
Seven: "Fitting after their bizarre methods of scheduling Mystery
Science Theater 3000."
{The Doctor tells the EMH-2 about his experiences.}
Janeway: "Good work Doctor, you are actually providing us with some
quality entertainment."
Doctor (cheery): "Just trying to help."
{The Doctor tells him that he was saving Voyager back when he was just
a gleam in his programmer's eye.}
Doctor (as himself): "When I was you age I had to walk from one end of
the ship to another for a laser scalpel, uphill, both ways!"
{The EMH-2 tells him to get him the thrombic modulator.}
Paris (as the EMH-2): "I don't need it. I just like saying it because
it sounds dirty."
{The Doctor has trouble identifying the medical device and the EMH-2
tells him that medical science no longer uses scalpels or leeches.}
Harry: "I KNEW those leeches weren't Starfleet issue!"
{On the bridge of Voyager it shows the crew of Voyager, all deep in
thought panning first past B'Elanna.}
B'Elanna (as herself, thinking): "I wonder what Seven's doing right
now."
{Then Harry.}
Harry (as himself, thinking): "I wonder what Seven's doing right now."
{Then Paris.}
Paris (as himself, thinking): "I wonder what Seven's wearing right
now."
{Chakotay comes on the bridge and says Seven refuses to leave her
position monitoring the link to the network because she does not have
to regenerate for several days.}
B'Elanna (as herself) "Permission to go to astrometrics and. relieve
Seven?"
{Janeway and Chakotay talk about getting letters home ready, and say
it's too risky.}
Doctor: "So it is safe enough to risk my life, but not sure enough to
get a letter ready?"
{Paris comes into sickbay to treat some crewmembers for heartburn and
learn it came from Neelixes chili.}
Tuvok (as Neelix): "Lieutenant Tuvok has classified it a biohazard and
is in the process of disposal."
{Back in the prototype sickbay the Doctor has the EMH-2 list the
available sedatives.}
Paris (as EMH-2): "We also have some really good Nyborg."
{The Doctor and the EMH-2 continue to banter.}
Paris: "Must be Andy Dick, that's the only possibility."
{The Doctor tells the EMH-2 about his having sexual relations and
modifying his program to allow him to do so. The EMH-2 asks him to
make that alteration to his program before he goes.}
Doctor (as himself): "Are you hitting on me?"
Paris: "You mean he didn't have."
Harry (laughing): "No wonder he was so cranky."
{The Doctor goes onto the bridge and tells the Romulans he needs to
scan them for the Torothga virus.}
Chakotay: "Torothga, translation, the BS virus."
{He tells them the stomach cramps are bad, but the rash is supposed to
be worse.}
Tuvok: "It this still the virus? Or are we talking about Mr. Neelixes
chili again?"
{The Commander tells the female officer to alter their course to give
the ship to the Tal Shiar.}
All: "Dum, De, Dummmmmmm."
{The Romulan commander checks the Doctor's tricorder and find out it
was not scanning anything.}
Doctor (as himself): "This Romulan is dead, or my tricorder has
stopped."
Tuvok: "I believe the EMH is clever enough to make scans that could
then be revealed as not having the virus."
{In sickbay Paris scans a crewman and tells him to order the chicken
salad next time.}
Paris (as himself): "You get used to the feathers right away."
{Harry comes into sickbay and Paris asks him if sickbay looks like the
helm of a starship.}
B'Elanna: "Well neither is the holodeck, but that doesn't keep you
away."
Paris: "I guess I just like being agreed with once in awhile."
B'Elanna: "Makes sense, nothing with its own mind would agree with
you."
Paris: "OW!"
(Harry sits back after smacking Tom in the back of the head.)
B'Elanna and Seven: "Thank you Harry."
{Harry asks Tom if he accidentally injected himself with a
psychotropic agent.}
Paris (as himself): "Yes. accidentally."
{Paris complains about having to be the Doctor and Harry tells him it
is just until the Doctor gets back. Paris asking what will happen if
he doesn't get back.}
Harry (as himself): "Do you mean before or after we celebrate?"
{Paris asks Harry to build a new EMH.}
Doctor: "Why don't you just use my back up copy from "Living Witness?"
B'Elanna: "The only machine capable of making a back up must have been
the one that was stolen, and we were unable to make a new one."
{Seven enters astrometrics and find B'Elanna.}
Seven (as herself): "I thought our date wasn't until after our duty
shifts were complete."
Chakotay: "I guess she did go down there to. relieve Seven."
{Seven finds out B'Elanna has made modifications in astrometrics and
asks her why.}
Seven (as herself): "So I can not make modifications in engineering,
but you can in astrometrics?"
{B'Elanna says she needs to learn to say please."
B'Elanna (as herself): "It's not just "kiss me." its "Please kiss me."
{B'Elanna calls Seven rude, saying she does not know how to say please
or thank you.}
B'Elanna (as herself): "You've heard me say thank you, it's not that
though."
Seven (as herself): "Should I include the "Oh my God." Before saying
thank you?"
{Seven says that she is rude in a questioning manner.}
Seven (as herself): "Does this mean I have been a bad girl again?"
{B'Elanna turns away angrily.}
Seven (as herself): "Now is the point we should kiss and make up."
B'Elanna (grinning): "Okay."
(B'Elanna reaches a hand behind Seven's head and pulls her close.
Giving her a slow lingering series of kisses both women are smiling
during the process, and still smiling afterwards as they sit back.)
B'Elanna: "Well I feel better."
Paris (grinning): "So do I."
(Seven and B'Elanna look at Harry.)
Harry (grinning): "What? I agree with him."
{B'Elanna says that Seven has not been listening to her.}
Seven (as herself): "I'm sleeping in the alcove again aren't I?"
{They receive a transmission from the relay and B'Elanna asks if it is
the Doctor.}
Seven (as herself): "No, it is someone asking if we are happy with our
current long distance company."
{On the other vessel the Romulan commander asks the Doctor what else
he has done.}
Doctor (as himself): "I've added more charm and personality then this
ship has had in its existence."
{The Romulan threatens to deactivate him if he doesn't answer his
questions, the Doctor notes he will probably deactivate him anyway so
he fails to see the point.}
Doctor (as himself): "So there, nyah."
{The Romulan demands to know who is controlling the Doctor's program.}
Doctor (as himself): "Paramount."
{The female Romulan finds a record of receiving a holographic
transmission.}
Tuvok: "Bobo is attacking them too?"
{The female Romulan asks if he is supposed to spy on them, or if their
mission includes sabotage.}
Doctor (as himself): "Well since it is a Federation ship in the first
place."
{He tells them about the Federation ship in the Delta Quadrant and
they say it is ridiculous.}
Janeway: "Perhaps, but we have been going six seasons now."
{As the Romulans are about to perform an algorithm extraction on the
Doctor a gaseous sound is heard and the Romulans start to gag.}
Paris: "Neelixes chili strikes again."
{The EMH-2 gives a detailed account of how he managed to anesthetize
the entire ship.}
Tuvok: "I believe the Doctor has managed to train the EMH Mark Two in
his own image."
(The rest of the crew except the Doctor shudders.)
{The EMHes transfer to the bridge and the Doctor tells him he has had
piloting experience, two lessons, in the holodeck, on a shuttle.}
Doctor (as himself): ". with Chakotay."
{The EMH-2 accuses the Doctor of not knowing what he's doing.}
Doctor (as himself): "That's never stopped me before."
{The Doctor uses a trick he saw Paris use.}
Paris: "Picked up that one did you?"
Doctor: "It was that or listen to you speak."
{They find out the trick has caused the warp core to start to breech.}
B'Elanna: "How many times have you been performing this trick Paris?"
{Back on Voyager in astrometrics they try to negotiate with a Hirogen,
but when he does not respond to negotiation Seven give him a shock.
Which B'Elanna compliments her on.}
B'Elanna: "She so cute when she's being clever."
{In sickbay Tom and Harry work on the EMH replacement. When Tom
suggests giving him more hair Harry suggests getting him working first
and then working on personal grooming.}
Doctor: "We tried that with Paris, but we are still working on the
"get him working" part."
{Harry tries to warm Tom that it may not work, and Tom asks him what
happened to his youthful enthusiasm.}
Harry (as himself): "I've been on Voyager for four seasons at this
point."
{The EMH replacement begins reciting Grey's anatomy and both Tom and
Harry try to get it to stop.}
B'Elanna: "Guys, we can't even get the current EMH to shut up."
{The EMH replacement overloads and vanishes.}
Harry: "At least we got to watch him disappear."
{Harry downloads Grey's anatomy for Paris.}
B'Elanna: "Better download Hooked on Phonics for him first."
{The EMHes struggle to pilot the ship.}
Chakotay: "If this thing is so tough to pilot. Then how did the
Romulans have such an easy time of it?"
{The EMHes try to pilot through the space battle.}
B'Elanna (arching her eyebrows): "You two seem to have quite a bit of
antagonistic chemistry."
Doctor: "I am a holographic projection, I have no chemical
structures."
{The EMHes celebrate the victory.}
B'Elanna: "The rambling is one SERIOUS design flaw!"
{Two Starfleet security officers beam over, and the Doctor says it was
about time.}
Janeway: "I'll say, this episode has gone on forever."
{The EMH makes it back to Voyager where Seven and B'Elanna transmit
him into sickbay. He tells them he spoke to command and learned
Voyager had been declared lost 14 months ago.}
Seven: "That must have been when Brannon Braga took over."
{The Doctor tells them Starfleet wanted him to say that they are no
longer alone. Janeway then says sixty thousand light years seems a
little closer today.}
Paris: "Why do I see that being spliced into a long distance
commercial?"
Janeway: "They don't have enough to get me to sell my good name, and
right now that only thing I want is to get out of this theater."
{As the screen goes blank the crew rushes for the doors while the
holodeck returns to its normal grid.}

{The crew seems to be recuperating on the bridge, most at their
stations except the Doctor is standing at Seven's and Seven is
standing behind B'Elanna at her engineering station.}
Tuvok (tapping his station): "Captain sensors detect. a New York
office building?"
Janeway: "Hail them?"
{The screen comes to life showing a short man in a suit filling a cup
of coffee.}
Dave: "Hello, I'm Dave Nelson, would you happen to have seen a tall,
spindly fellow with blond hair?"
Janeway (eyes glazed as she stares at the coffee): "Is that REAL
coffee?"
Dave (smiling): "Yes, would you like some?"
Janeway (taking a deep breath): "That would be most gracious of you."
Dave: "Joe?"
Joe (off screen): "On it!"
(Joe Garelli walks on screen and puts down a bag of coffee beans, he
then seems to notice the women standing rather close together at the
engineering station and gets a grin on his face.)
Dave: "Joe, Joe, JOE!"
Joe: "What? Oh yeah, right."
(He taps some buttons on column and the bag beams over to in front of
the Captain's chair. Dave then gets a fresh WNYX mug and fills it. He
then engages the transporter and a cup appears on Janeway's armrest,
which she immediately begins to sip. An ecstatic look spreading across
her face.)
Joe (to Seven): "So you're Borg?"
Janeway (to Dave): "Thank you Mr. Nelson."
Dave: "My pleasure, we coffee drinkers have to stick together."
Joe (to B'Elanna): "You, you're the engineer?"
B'Elanna (placing a hand behind to hold Seven's hand over her
shoulder): "Yeah, and her girlfriend."
Joe (grinning): "Cool."
Dave: "Now, about the person we were looking for?"
Doctor: "Yes, he is part of the medical staff on the USS Prometheus."
(Joe and Dave's jaws go slack as they stare at each other.)
Dave: "My God! Joe, lay in a course, maximum warp!"
(The screen goes bank. Janeway seems totally absorbed by her first
un-replicated cup of coffee since entering the Delta Quadrant so
Chakotay stands and addresses the crew.)
Chakotay: I believe."
Pearl (as the screen comes to life show her van, the Widowmaker's
interior): "Not so fast there Chuckles! You may have survived this
episode, but there are six other seasons and seven isn't looking that
good either."
B'Elanna (grinning as she over does a leer at Seven): "Oh, I don't
know about that."
Pearl: "Yes, but for how long? We both know there are plenty of
episodes she stars in."
(B'Elanna jumps to her feet and Pearl begins to laugh.)
Pearl (smirking evilly): "Push the button Bobo."
{The screen fades to black.}
Seven (voice over): "So, your place or mine?"
B'Elanna (voice over): "Mine, your alcoves are rough on my back."
 
{The scene flashes across the screen of the EMH-2 saying. "What the
hell are you doing in my sickbay?"}